delight, excitement, exhaustion, confusion… what next?

Days of delight and excitement and exhaustion and confusion … a round-up post, just a stream of consciousness.

Confusion: my tomatoes still grow, the sun still shines and the news from the rest of the world IMG_5370is still dire. See earlier post of despair. Also, see below, how this morning was spent working to improve the international student situation – here and here. Crazy world. Though I do think we do better, there is still a very long way to go.

Exhaustion: It is official – I am old, D**nit. Yesterday the family moved back from the small summer rental home to their own home (which has been rented all summer at twice the price). I offered to help pack up. I did help pack up. It was easy, all the girls were sorting their stuff into bags and boxes, I did stuff like move clothes from the closet to the bed, put towels in the washing machine, hung other stuff out to dry, not very much. Rory was brilliant, ten years old, organised, intelligent, willing and a real cheerful dynamo all day. Wendy cleaned, Callum fetched and carried from one house to the other. I got home. Utterly exhausted, could hardly move, obviously an old old woman. Dammmmmmmmmmmmmmiitttttt. No photo to express this.

Delight and Excitement: Earlier in the week went on an Ocean View Foundation bird walk on Andy’s Way with Kim, Lisa and Stephanie. Reports of a white ibis (rare this far north) ARE TRUE. We saw it fly alongside two egrets and then they all settled – rather far away. Stephanie had a long lens camera so here is her picture, thanks Stephanie and Kim, a great egret on a rock and the ibis in the foreground. This is a juvenile shown by the brown back, and will be white when it matures as in the comparison picture from wikipedia. Then, Stephanie saw something at the edge of the marsh, through the lens we saw this bird preening, quietly surveying its world from its hiding place, and she got another picture.

Identification ??? still showing the rail picture to experts but Kim thinks it is indeed a clapper rail – the book says they are shy, retiring and hide in the marshes.

I have been on a bird walk where Kim was quite wildly excited. She has wanted to see a rail. She thought this was even better than the ibis. Me – I can tell when I have seen a seagull – I love watching all the others, asking what they are, the plovers, the sanderlings, the willets and the herons and egrets and also, I love the excitement and knowledge of my friends.

Confusion again: Spent this morning working with Socha on some tasks regarding the International student workers on the island. From earlier posts regular readers know this is not a totally idyllic place – just like the rest of the world a microcosm where attitudes and actions of all kinds try to co-exist. OK so far so good, but just as we finished, working together on my computer, a macbook pro, something happened to it. I got a frozen screen, a strange black one with little bits of my happy desktop showing round the edges.

This is a cheat - I didn't even think of taking a photo
This is a cheat – I didn’t even think of taking a photo – but it is what it looked like …aaagghhh …aaagghhh

AND nothing would change it. FRUSTRATION – so said goodbye to Socha, decided to turn the Mac off. It would not turn off. It asked – as it always does – if I was sure I wanted to turn my computer off, but the Yes button could not respond. I remembered the key command for Force Quit and got a window that asked what I wanted to quit. No click to let me say anything will do. After a while, I had a desktop that was black except for all the Mac’s polite queries that I couldn’t answer as I didn’t have a working click.

Sorry to go on and on about this… I am so dependent on my computer for so much.. How did that happen?

An hour or so later, accessing mac forums on the iphone, another gadget that makes me feel old though the computer does not, I felt like shouting at it – I SAID I CAN’T CLICK. I SAID I CAN’T TURN IT OFF. I SAID I CAN’T ACCESS THE WHATEVER YOU HAVE JUST TOLD ME WORKED FOR YOU. Then as I was about to switch it off, one little line, try the trackpad three-finger swipe.

What on earth?? Three fingers on the pad – quick flick across



Thank you anonymous stranger.

Do you wonder that I am confused? What has all this to do with getting on with life – in which I am getting on a bit? Today I feel crazy.

What an amazing crazy world

Today, coincidence, my grandsons are 7 years old.

Donal Cindy, Louis and Ali
Louis with Cindy, Ali with Donal

I hope they reach a happy 70 + but I think my grandmothers – both women of intelligence, imagination and empathy – could not have envisaged what my life is like. I cannot imagine what theirs will be in another 7 years let alone when/if they reach 70, these much traveled much loved bilingual  混血 双胞胎 (hunxue shuangbao tai) – third culture twins – but I have a ticket to go to China 17 days from now. I will see them again.

More days of delight and excitement and exhaustion and confusion…





3 thoughts on “delight, excitement, exhaustion, confusion… what next?

    1. quite – I suppose you mean the “when they are 70” not the triple swipe though that was what began the confused train of thoughts – the imagination can’t reach too far ahead these days


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